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My mother passed away on the 26th. My carrier was off the coast of the Phillipines at the time. Now, for those that don't know me, I didn't have the best relationship with my mother. She had some pretty bad issues that drove me and my siblings away. I thought that I was ok with that and managed to build up a bubble of anger and resentment towards what she did to us that I thought would insulate me when a time like this would come.
I was wrong. After I got the news I was upset. I mourned, moreso than I thought I would have. I guess that no matter what wrong she did or how much it hurt, the truth was that she was still my mom and her death affected me.
She died from terminal cancer. I later found out that she had both breast and lung cancer, seperately, but one or both and matastized to her bones. No one knew this. She kept this, like most other things, secret from everyone.
I was lucky that the Navy allowed me to come home. I'll post about the trip later.
My sister organized everything well. When I got here on Tuesday everything was arranged. My brother, whom I haven't seen in over 10 years, made a long trip up from Georgia with his family to be here.
We had our calling hours, our wake and now my mom is buried close to her father whom she loved greatly. I'm worried for my uncle, her brother. He's buried his father, mother, and now older sister. I'm concerned and part of that is a selfish concern. I don't want to bury anyone else just yet.
My brother had to leave today to go pick up his step-daughter from a state over and make the trip back to Georgia. My sister is currently working on sorting though mom's stuff at her apartment. I'll be doing that myself, but tomorrow. My mom was a pack rat.
Thanks go out to all my friends that helped me get home and were concerned about me during this time. I'm OK. I'm hanging in there.
But I do miss my mom....Current Mood:  sad |
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jgoble's journal